Shit-fuck bitch ass bouncers…. Yes, I’m a little bitter

FR: 5/9/13

Drove to LA, from Vegas, to catch the RSD free tour. Left a little early; while Tyler was rambling. Went out to downtown LA to pickup a girl my boy met in Vegas.

We parked right outside “Perch” and my boy called her to come down. He talked her into leaving her friend and going to get some food with him. Plan was to drop him and the girl off and for me to go to Lure in Hollywood.

While on our way to a Mexican restaurant, the girl gets a text message from her friend saying that her roommate/friend was sick and had to go to the hospital. Was really weird and we kind of thought it might have been made up, but didn’t stress too much over it. Dropped her off and headed out to Hollywood.

We we’re told to buy tickets for $20 online, but we thought we were too cool and tried to work the door. We figured worst case we’d be able to just pay the cover and get in.

Stupid us: door man was a dick, the whole thing was unorganized and a large cluster of fucks. Promoters were supplicating to the main dude and dude was a big headed, douche bag to the max; so fake and fragile. It was kind of hilarious.

After an hour or so of persisting, we decided to try somewhere else. We go over to Hollywood blvd and find a hipster bar. The bar was almost pitch black, loud and high energy. The crowd wasn’t my typical crowd and kind of put me into a weird headspace.

I was partially afraid of hitting up a dude with long hair because I couldn’t see shit. LOL. My boy hooked a girl right away and spent a lot of the time there with her.

I stood around for a while, putting myself in the worst headspace of the challenge. Was pretty gay. After a while I finally made a move right before we were about to leave and made my brain transition to: ‘People are generally nice and there’s no reason you are not enough.’

We leave a little after to go hit up outside of Lure. First girls we approach were walking away to their car. My wing hit them up first; I roll up second. Set goes ok, but they are heading home and persist to leave despite our attempts to lure them with weed that we don’t have to an after party that we don’t even have a venue for yet. Ha.

Next set I remember is a little Swedish girl, super cute. I hit up and she is super distracted trying to get her drunk friend away from some creeper dude trying to take her with him. I persist just enough to keep her engaged with me, but not enough to annoy her and blow it out.

After the friend is handled she comes back to me. I tell her that I know some Norwegian: ‘Vil du ha mine barne.’ Meaning: ‘I want you to have my babies.’ I hung with her for a bit and handled her drunk friend’s attempt to blow out. Telling me that if I break her heart, she’s gonna break me.

I told her that we’d be together forever and that I like how she looks out for her friend because she’d look after her while I was not around. Drunken friend disarmed.

Kind of funny: I see Todd in my peripheral and he sends in his boot camp student to come wing me.

The student comes in weak, looking at me for permission and I don’t think he even talked to the girl. My wing sees this dude and brushes him off easily and engages the friend to wing me LOL.

Later another dude is trying to take home my girl’s friend and my girl has me blow him out. I work for logistics and try to work the pull. Unfortunately logistics are not there and I see her off to a taxi.

Hit up a couple more sets. Next memorable set is a tall 9. I roll up super relaxed and very present. She’s facing the way I’m walking from and we make eye contact from about 5 feet away. I hold it and open with a, “Hey there.” Super smooth, present, basic conversation and she’s super hooked.

Her friend is screaming her name right next to her and her focus is completely on me. Doesn’t break. Finally I break the tension after the logistics aren’t there and get ready to bounce. Before I do, she shyly asks for my number and suggests we hang out sometime.

I find out next day when she hits me up that she’s a professional cheerleader for Chiva’s USA. Super hot.

Hit a few more up and then drive back to SD at 3am in the morning. FML.

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