OK, so last night. Hit up Stingaree in downtown San Diego. Apparently Method Man and Red Man were performing. Normally, we’d get in free, but it was pretty tight. Paid the dude off $40 for 3 total, normal cover was $30 for that night I guess.
Whatever. We roll inside and decide to get stamped before anything. We go to get stamped, but faggot at the door is making us fucking leave and walk around to the entrance. Douche-fucking-bag.
Since we’re out, we decide to hit up another bar. Having had a spectacular night the night before, I learned that it is EXTREMELY FUCKING IMPORTANT TO HIT SHIT UP IF YOU HAVE THE SLIGHTEST DESIRE TO HIT IT UP.
****Now what the fuck does this mean? It means that if you have an inkling of a desire to talk to a girl, you need to talk to her. NO FUCKING EXCUSES. AT ALL. PERIOD. If you don’t, it will be a decline in your flow state – one step back. If you do, it will blast you forward – 10 fold. Key to success right there. Even if you get blown out or you’re nervous/nothing to say. Doesn’t matter. If she’s with her boyfriend, she’s too hot, etc. Just do it. You will thank yourself.
Also, if you’re out with wings, it’s important to take action before you see them taking action. You see them go. You go. You don’t see them go. You go. The reason this is important is because you need to give yourself permission. You need to take charge of yourself. Don’t let your wings give you permission in the environment; give yourself the permission. It’s empowering and it tells your mind that you are the one that makes the decisions and dictates your reality. It keeps you out of spectator mode, which is hard to get out of once you’re in.
So as we’re crossing the street, I see a cute group of 4 girls. I point at one and make a comment. She hears half of it and asks me to repeat the other half. We chat for a little. I’m still a little uncalibrated (tonality, verbals, body language), but she’s still intrigued. She stays, waiting on the corner talking to me until her friend says, “this isn’t a stop light, what are you waiting for? We can go.” This snaps her out of it and they walk on.
We get into this little hole in the wall bar called Tivoli’s. We hit the patio. My roommate and friend start hitting a couple sets up. I wanted to smoke a cigarette, so I chill back and smoke while they do their thing. Not good, since I’m out, I should be hitting shit up. Really need to quit smoking. I’m making a bad habit of smoking when I’m out and I’ve been actually buying packs lately. Next on the to do list.
As I’m sitting there smoking, I’m putting myself into spectator mode watching my two friends talking and taking action. Not good. I don’t hit anything up in that bar.
We head back to Sting. Friends had to go to the bathroom, so I waited by the dance floor. There were a couple of sets I could have hit up, but I didn’t. I did, however, hit up a girl that walked by. Only one. I head up to the rooftop a few minutes later and start hitting shit up more avidly.
I run into my roommate and he’s already in super state because he hits shit up pretty hard. He tells me to give him the craziest opener I could think of and point a girl out and that he’s so money that it won’t even matter. So I give him the line, “I shoved a huge, black dildo up my ass earlier,” and point out a little cutie in a blue dress.
He walks over and the look on the girl’s face is priceless. Straight freaked out. LOL. Her friend has kind of a freaked out / wants to laugh because its so weird look on her face. The scuttle away from him, but he reopens, probably saying that he was just joking and (pointing at me) saying that I told him to.
I took this as a chance to open myself and tell them he was just joking and both the girls start laughing. I chat up for a bit and apparently there’s a big bday party. I get introduced to all the friends and basically become part of the party. The dudes in the group like me, etc. I chat for a bit to pump my state and excuse myself when it starts getting a little boring.
Hit shit up a bit more until a bikini fashion show started. I got a little distracted for a bit.
********!@*#!*@#*!@# I have to get back to work right now, my lunch break is almost over. I will finish writing this a bit later. (I work 40 hours + a week. Still hit it up until 3-4 am in the morning. Actually had a meeting at 8:30am this morning, hit it up until 3:30am last night.@#$@#$!!*********
OK, back – trying to recall what happened next. I’m gonna lay out only the important aspects. I’m pretty sure after the fashion show, we hit up a couple more sets on the rooftop and then decide to go downstairs. Downstairs we talk to a couple more sets and then leave the club.
We run into a friend in the street and he says that he has a two set in this small, but pretty nice, bar called Bollywood. My two friends go to the two girls. I stand there for second and remind myself that it would probably be good to get in set instead of just hovering. There was a girl sitting by herself near the front of the bar that I saw on the way in.
Looking over she was still there and I debate whether or not to go in. Now I mention earlier that if you have any inkling of desire to approach: DO IT.
I have a couple thoughts: She might be here with someone, the bar is so empty, what if I immediately get blown out, etc. I immediately cut the thought patterns off and reframe it: Lets just see what happens and start walking over.
I open with. *tap on the shoulder* and, “Hey. Hello, I’m Andrew.” We chat for a good 30-45 minutes. She ditched her friends that went to a super ghetto, basement bar calls C Lounge and she was hanging out alone, sobering up before driving home. She had perfect logistics.
I seed for the pull. I try to get things sexual. When I mentioned sex as being a good release. She agreed and gave indicators of wanting to fuck, but for some reason, I froze up a bit and let silence reign. I broke it shortly after, changing the subject. So fucking gay. I guess it’s getting used to flowing with that stuff without the numbness of being intoxicated. Just another part of going sober.
I go for the pull because I don’t want to hang out there any longer. She’s not down. Probably because I couldn’t handle the sexual tension. Fuck it. Grab her number and bounce.
This interaction and because of the right action I took, boosted my state. I feel amazing and meet up with the wings again. We hit shit up some more and I call it a night around 3am.
Multiple times throughout the night I overcame the AA and fed off the desire of approaching a set. Even HB9s & 10s. Main girls I want to focus on. Always cutting off the negative thought patterns and replacing them with: Let’s see what happens!
Successful, but slow night. Being fully rested definitely helps.